Hazel Beatrice Jauer Heggins
Last Thursday, January 23, 2008, my mother took her dogs for a walk on a very cold rainy day. During that walk, something happened and she got lost. One of the dogs abandoned her and returned to the house. The other dog, Ruby, stayed with my mom, and was still guarding her when she was found huddled in an old deer blind about 5 miles from the ranch.
Despite the heroic efforts of dozens of law enforcement and rescue personnel, my cousins Ricky and Billy Rogers, and my sister Deanna Holler and her husband Joe Holler, she wasn't found until Friday, and by then it was too late.
My mother was born September 5, 1934, and graduated from Sinton High School in Sinton, Texas in 1953. After her graduation, she worked as a telephone operator. One of her friends introduced her to a young man that my mom said was the silliest guy she had ever met, a total showoff and a big joker.
That man was Bennie William Heggins, my dad. She married my dad on Halloween of 1953, after knowing each other for a very short time--he always claimed it was 2 weeks, but she told me it was more like a month. They were married 52 years, until his death in 2006.
During their lives together, they raised five daughters, all of whom survive them. From the oldest to the youngest: Belinda Hazel Heggins Aguilar, Brenda Kay Heggins Bryant, Deanna Louise Heggins Holler, Teresa Leah Heggins Walker, and myself, Kelly Denis Heggins Schlenker, and our respective spouses, children, and grandchildren. My mother is also survived by her brother, Leland Jauer, Jr. and his wife Rita Gay Jauer of Houston, Texas, and their daughter. My mother is also survived by several of her in-laws, including Marion and Joyce Heggins of Houston. There are others, but please excuse me if I forget them at this time.
Front: Kelly (me), and Teresa
Back Row: Brenda, Deanna, Belinda
December 1964, Nogales, Arizona
A memorial service will be held at Rancho La Leona East in Guerra, Texas at 11 AM on February 2, 2008; if her ashes are ready, her cremains will also be scattered at that time.
I miss my father a great deal; but I was very close to my mom. She was a lot of fun to go shopping with and go window shopping together even when we were broke. We went to go see dumb (and not so dumb) movies together and we shared books back and forth. When she moved out there, I tried to take her as many videos and books as I could--their tv reception sucked and they were too broke for even a basic satellite package and my dad hated going to the movies, so she never went unless I took her. Mom was always there when I needed a shoulder to cry on over the phone, or to tell her what her namesake and other granddaughters had won or done that week. We loved talking about our animals and their escapades. She was always there to tell me how many calves were born, and if they had rain. She had always been a real calming influence on me (and I am a very hyper high strung person).
I have had "well meaning" people try to tell me that because of Mom's mild Alzheimer's, maybe this was a blessing in diguise. F*ck that. They aren't me. They don't know how I feel. They don't realize my mom was getting better now that she was taking her medicine correctly (thanks to Deanna--I am very grateful to my sister helping my mom all these months; actually, I am extremely grateful to her and her husband Joe; they have both been very wonderful). My mom was looking forward to the future, to seeing her greatgrandchild, Deanna's grandbaby, being born. She was looking forward to the chance to come to Houston and stay with Jessica and Christine and to see my peafowl, turkeys, chickens, and emus. She was really looking forward to Alyssa getting leave before shipping out to Iraq; we were determined that all of us were going down there so all the girls could see her.
These are the same kind of people who seem to think if a person is disabled, that person would be better off dead. Well folks, I am disabled. And I WANT TO LIVE. My mom wanted to live; I know, because Ronald and I finally got to go visit her--we went down there on the Tuesday and Wednesday before she disappeared. She was very excited about the guineas we brought down for Deanna (Mom loved guineas). She told me how excited she was about the greatgrandbaby to be.
I feel that if they don't have something sympathetic to say, they should just shut the f*ck up. They don't seem to realize their words hurt like a stab in the back, like my mom was a worn out old horse that should've have been taken out back and shot. If she were sicker, maybe I could understand their thoughtlessness. But she just wasn't that bad. And NO ONE deserves to die soaked to the skin, in 34 degree weather, with just a light shirt and jeans on in a nasty old deer blind. At least Ruby was there with her, so she didn't die completely alone.
Sorry to go off on a rant. I just had one too many people jaw off at me today. I have had a rough week; four of the seven puppies I took to NABS died because they dug up and bit into amaryllis bulbs in the foster home's yard--I found that out less than 12 hours before finding out that my mom had gone missing.
I put one red rose at the top of this post. My mom loved roses. She never got to raise any once she got to South Texas, there just wasn't enough water for her to "waste" it on a rose bush. I don't think it would have been a waste; it would have made her happy.
